It is the first time the tears fell for him. Never did it cross my mind that we would end up this way. I am not heart-broken seriously I am not. And I am not jealous either. But I just do not know why I was so mad when I heard about it. So I guess those were angry tears. I tried my best to control and acted strong on the outside. But my inside was rippling apart with pain? I am tired of all of these, having to pretend that I don’t really care, having to pretend that everything is okay when actually nothing is.

Right now I just simply wished that nothing had happened before and of course, the truth doesn’t exist. I know this is a selfish thought of mine but can’t things just work my way for this once? Can I not be tolerant for just once? Why must I always be the one to say, “It’s okay”? I am just tired of everything.

I used to trust him with everything. All the things he said and the promises he made. But only now I realized that were all just plainly lies. He asked if I had taken all those sweet stuffs for real. Seriously, I have not. He apologized and asked me why I am angry with him. I just can’t make up a reason. I just do not know why. He kept on saying he would tell me if only I had asked him. Which is completely rubbish. I can’t possibly inquire him of this every single day! This feeling just sucks, a lot. Having to know it this way is not the best thing in the world either.

I entirely lost my trust in him. I can’t distinguish between the lies anymore. And I am tired of having to guess about everything too. So I guess this is the end of ‘us’. I know both of us are reluctant to end things this way but I guess that is the only way for now. I am tired of having to listen to him, having to wait for his replies, which just makes me hate him more. I am just tired of everything and wished nothing had happened before. I never hate anyone so deep before. Thanks for being the first one.